Linda Noskova vs Elina Svitolina: Who Will Win This Match?

Alright, let’s talk about this tennis match, Linda Noskova versus Elina Svitolina. I don’t know much about tennis, but I watched some of it on TV. It was on while I was waiting for my soap opera, you know, the one with all the crying and yelling? Anyways, these two gals, Linda and Elina, they were whacking that little yellow ball back and forth.

So, who are these gals anyway? I heard the commentators talking, they said Elina Svitolina is seeded fifth. That sounds important, like she’s a big deal. And this Linda Noskova, she’s no slouch either, seems like she can really hit that ball hard. They were playing in this Monterrey Open, some fancy tournament down in Mexico. Mexico, huh? I hear it’s real hot down there. Makes you sweat just thinking about it.

This match, it wasn’t no easy peasy thing. It went on for a bit. They said on TV it was the quarterfinals. That means they’re getting close to the end, right? Like, the last few folks standing. Must be tiring, running around that court all day. My knees hurt just watching them! But they kept going, hitting that ball, back and forth, back and forth. It was like watching chickens peck at corn, only faster and with more grunting.

• First Set: I think Linda, she won the first set. The commentators were all excited, saying things like “Noskova takes the lead!” I was just hoping they’d hurry up so I could watch my show.
• Second Set: Then Elina, she came back strong in the second set. She was hitting the ball real hard, and Linda, she couldn’t keep up. It was like watching a cat chase a mouse, only the mouse was getting away.

The commentators, they kept saying stuff about “odds” and “predictions.” I don’t know nothing about that. They said Svitolina was favored to win. Sounded like they thought she was gonna beat Linda. But Linda, she put up a good fight. She really did.

And then, what happened? Well, Linda, she won the whole darn thing! Beat Elina two sets to zero. The commentators were surprised, I think. They kept saying things like, “Upset!” and “Noskova advances!” I didn’t understand half of it, but I knew Linda won. Good for her, I say. She seemed like a nice girl, always polite to the ball boys and girls. That’s important, you know. Being nice.

They also played each other in the Australian Open, earlier in the year, I think. I saw that one too, or parts of it anyway. That was a longer match, went on for a while. They said it was the fourth round. Again, that sounds important. They fought hard there too, but I can’t remember who won that one. My memory ain’t what it used to be, you know. Too much worrying about the price of eggs these days.

This Elina Svitolina, she’s been around a while, they said on TV. She’s got some experience, they called it. Linda, she’s younger, but she’s real strong. Like a young bull in a china shop, only she’s hitting tennis balls instead of knocking over teacups. And speaking of hitting, those girls hit that ball HARD! I wouldn’t want to get hit by one of those, no sir. It’d knock you right into next week!

So, what’s the bottom line? Linda Noskova, she beat Elina Svitolina in Monterrey. Two sets to nothing. That’s all I really know. And it was hot in Mexico. And I still don’t understand all them fancy tennis rules. But it was entertaining enough, I guess. At least until my soap opera came on. Now THAT’S real drama!

I heard they might play each other again. Maybe I’ll watch, maybe I won’t. Depends on what else is on TV. And if I remember to take my nap. Getting old ain’t easy, you know. But at least watching these young folks run around keeps me feeling young, even if my knees tell me otherwise. They said they played August 23rd, in Mexico, at the center court. That Linda, she really gave Elina a run for her money. Good for her, I say. Good for her.

Tags: [Linda Noskova, Elina Svitolina, Monterrey Open, Tennis, WTA, Quarterfinals, Australian Open, Sports]